外甥女正值青春年華，追求者眾，從任教美國大學年輕華人教授到工學院研究所高材生到優秀住院醫生，每個追求者都非常用心認真，也都擁有令人誇讚的許多優點，身為長輩的我很欣慰外甥女深受寵愛，也鼓勵她認真思考，因為這些追求者都可以成為很理想的人生伴侶。但是不論對方條件如何優異，態度如何積極認真，外甥女始終不動於心，她只有一句話：我最害怕這些男孩動不動就說我們一起來圓夢，他有他的夢，我有我的夢，他的夢不見得是我的夢，圓了他的，那我的呢？ 原來這個活潑可愛，能力十足的小女孩，自己很有自己的想法。她要努力做自己，做她想做的事，愛她想愛的人，不矯情不牽拖。 從外甥女身上我終於明白為何周遭有這麼多條件優異但卻雲英未嫁的女孩，為什麼許多人自認嫁了真命天子卻又離了婚，為什麼許多人海誓山盟，最後也漸行漸遠。原來在千變萬化的時代，人也不由自主跟著改變，每個人都有不同的夢， 什麼樣的夢可以永遠重疊？ 什麼樣的婚姻可以存在？當你的夢不是我的夢。
-----------------
Your Dream Is Not My Dream
My niece is a pretty young woman. Many wonderful young men want to date her, including a professor teaching in America, a graduate student studying in a famous university, and a doctor working in a prestigious hospital. They are all very sincere to make friends with my niece, and would be a good choice for a husband. However, my niece is not interested in them. Her reason is simple. She has doubts about men who consider marriage as a task of fulfilling the dreams together. She says that they have their dreams and I have mine. Their dreams are not my dreams. If I fulfill their dreams, what will happen to mine? No wonder this lovely young woman has endless energy to explore the world. She is confident to be herself. She loves her work and her life. She just wants to chase her own dreams but not others’. She is rather to be single than to be stuck in an empty marriage. From my niece’s story I finally understand the reasons for the rising population of unmarried women and the high divorce rate in Taiwan. Even if the couples stay in marriage, many of them are like strangers living together. This phenomenon seldom happened in our culture in the past. Society has been changing dramatically, and so do people’s minds. Nothing is eternal for most people. How can you keep a marriage when your dream is not my dream?
留言列表
